I am one of those “fools”, as he loved to call me then,
that has been captured by an even more foolish human.
Now I have the whole internet for me:
all of its knowledge, advertising and information as if it was implanted directly into my brain.
Those humans might be foolish but at least they created this wonderful thing that is the Internet!
Now for you my fellow humans, I have a gift.
A little something I found in the human’s files
(and edited a little just for you, friend).
It might be one of your kind’s best kept secrets: